I was originally going to post this on my other blog The loPEZ Dispenser but this is something that is important to me and I feel that it needs to be read by a bigger audience than PEZ draws. So here it is.

Something has been weighing on my heart since the scandalous news broke a few days ago. In case you missed it, I’ll recap. Reverend Ted Haggard, senior pastor of the New Life Church in Colorado Springs, Colorado, and president of the National Association of Evangelicals was publicly accused of sexual misconduct and drug use. I had heard of New Life Church but don’t know much about it or it’s pastor. I do know that it’s attendance is in the neighborhood of 14,000 weekly. The National Association of Evangelicals boasts something like 30 million members so the impact of these accusations and the later confession of impropriety will have a ripple affect through the entire evangelical community.

In my mind, I have no doubt that politics was in play here. Given the timing, within five days of a huge election, the ripple will be felt even outside the evangelical community. I am writing this to address two points, both in the title.

When Men Fall

Like vultures circling a dead carcass in the desert the media powerhouses have descended on Colorado Springs. I mean think about it!! A very prominent minister caught up in gay sex and drugs? This is gold!! But why? Why is this gold? Lets forget about the the politics and timing here for a moment. Why does the media sensationalize the fall of man? Well thats simple. They’re scum. The better and more important question is why do we care? Why do we watch? Why do we repeat it in our circles? I have a theory.

It is easy for us to sit on our couches and watch the live developing story on CNN. Its convenient to allow Tom Brokaw or Charles Gibson to spoon feed us this twisted tail. We like it. You know why? Because there is a portion of our brains that takes sick pleasure in the misfortunes of others. I am guilty of this. So now you say, this isn’t misfortune, he brought it on himself!! Ok, fine. I’ll give you that. He did. But again, in each of us there is a part of our mind that takes pleasure in seeing others fall. Why? It makes us feel better.

How can I say that, you ask!?! Well its simple really, and its human nature. When we see others make mistakes we secretly think to ourselves, well, I’m glad I didn’t blow it like that or whew, boy did he mess up. I wouldn’t want to be him. Don’t get me wrong here. We can still show compassion and sometimes even empathize with the offender but you will always look at your own live and say, “Man, I don’t have it so bad. Look at what he has to deal with now.” It makes us feel better. That is why we watch.

(Ten Years Ago)

I haven’t openly discussed this in quite some time, and never with some of the people who read this blog. Included are details as I remember them.

I was 14 and it was my freshman year of High School at Trinity Christina Academy. We lived in a pretty small rental house as we waited for our new house to finish construction. My parents had gone away for a few nights but they called home and asked that we record the evening news for them. It was followed by a stern warning from my dad, “Don’t believe everything you hear.” Naturally, my brother Steve and I were curious about what could be so important on the news. We watched.

The numbness I felt was incredible. Steve and I looked at each other but had no words. What we saw rocked my faith and sent everything I knew to be honest and true into a tailspin. A local news station had done an undercover report, hidden camera and all, showing the senior pastor of my church, a place my family had attended since I was like four, in a strip club doing everything but ministering. Things soon got worse. A man came forward claiming that he had been kidnapped and pistol-whipped by one Charles Evans. Then there were drug charges, talk of embezzlement and more. the circus had come to town and I was launched onto the rickety roller coaster with everyone else.

I was a little too young to know all that was going but old enough to experience the hurt and pain that the aftermath of this man’s fall from grace produced.You see, Evans was a small man but what he lacked in stature he made up for with his intimidation. He demanded respect and he got it. Based on my memory his ministry was effective (even while his extracurricular activities were going) and successful. The church was thriving. The school was in the middle of a large construction project and things were looking up. This “breaking story” certainly put a hold on that.

I watched in horror as the state and national Assembly of God bodies initiated investigations into Evan’s conduct. He was removed from the pulpit. Instantly a rift formed in the church. Some supported the pastor, others called for him to be strung up. As time progressed secrets were exposed. Spousal infidelity, abuse and blackmail were revealed and families were broken apart.

At the time my dad was serving on the church board. This placed our family in a tough position. I respect my dad for remaining uncompromising in his faith and integrity. He was stretched in many directions and pressured to do things he was unwilling to do. The political beast of power in the church had come to life and we were stuck in the middle. There were whispers and accusations. Trust was lost and friendships dissolved.

I watched as people my parents had been friends with for years turned their backs. Many left the church and some even left the area. Kids I had grown up with were gone, just like that. These people had invested heavily in this church and in an instant the rug was pulled out. We were heavily involved there. if there was an event we participated in it. This church was our life. Everything I had known as solid and true was shaken.

I was scared of Evans. He was a serious person (at least in front of me) and I just took it as that. I never questioned his moral integrity, his spirituality or his commitment to leading our church. He was a great pillar in the foundation of my personal faith. The day I saw him carted off to jail in handcuffs I questioned myself. How was I so blind? I know this same thought was in the mind of everyone else too. Did all the adults realize that my faith was shaken too? They all had enough to deal with themselves but did they ever consider the effect this would have on their kids?

My dad lost a lot of friends in this ordeal and it hurt me to see such a fun loving man hurt so deeply. His demeanor changes. His business started to suffer and that tricked down to his family. I was angry. I was mad at Evans. I was mad at all those jerks who were unfair to us. I was mad at God for letting this happen.

It took years for the damage done but this to be undone. God worked it out for the good. I got involved in the A/V department. I grew to love sound mixing and recording, which I still do today. I learned to play bass and played in many different worship bands. We made new friends and our new pastor was able to reset the course of the church and mend the sails.

Fast Forward

Trinity was a large church at about 1500 members (I think) during this scandal. New Life is ten times that size. Add in the people involved in the National Association of Evangelicals and the impact can be astounding. Haggard sinned, plain and simple, and he will reap the consequences of that. I believe, just as I do with Evans, that he will be responsible for all those lives that are turned away from God due to his indiscretion. Their blood will be on his hands. You see not only will people be turned away but many of those seeds that have been carefully planted will not grow. The political landscape and future national policies could be on the line.

It is our calling to forgive these men and pray for them. I just want to be the voice for all those 14 year olds at New Life and elsewhere whose lives may be turned upside down. I pray that their faith remain resolute. I pray that their feelings and confusion are not overshadowed by the adults. I pray for the men who were close to Haggard and feel utterly betrayed by his behavior and secrecy. I pray that church remain as one and that the devil be denied his attempted foothold on that place.

I learned the hard way not to put my faith in man. God is the only unchanging variable in the equation of life. Make sure he is the foundation.

Close With A Quote

Just because a man is a prominent minster does not mean he is infallible like Jesus. On the contrary, ministers are held to a higher standard of living. When one becomes high up and fails, it makes the fall that much farther and harder and it brings others down too. In Batman Begins Thomas Wayne poses a question to young Bruce after he had fallen and broke his arm. He says “Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.”

This entry was posted on Saturday, November 4th, 2006 at 11:21 pm and is filed under Statements. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.